No longer will you have to be degraded with proletarian materials like terrycloth or jersey as you rest on a grimy IKEA futon wondering what your family would think. You went to Yale, dammit! Act like it, with Lifetime Collective‘s Blundetto sweatpants, which boast the luxe cable-knitting you normally find on those wonderful sweaters Mumsy sends for New Haven’s cold winters. And guess what, ass? These comfy pants are tapered & cinched, so your lazy owner will actually feel comfortable leaving the house in ‘em.